i can't help but smile everytime i think of mabeth, and how lovely her life is going on right now.
after talking with her on the phone last night, i just felt happy that she is very happy. she might be the happiest person in the world right now. she IS the happiest person that i know, actually, and that makes me happy too.
okay, i might not be here anymore on her wedding day, so i might as well leave a message.
beep!
maria elizabeth f. napalinga,
thank you for putting this constant smile on my face. åh! you should know that i am very very happy for you mabethskie! you and your "the one" have finally found each other.
it's one of those magical moments when one feels complete and finally done with searching. it's also one of those exciting moments when one is looking forward for a new beginning, a new life.
your wedding plans excite me!!! to the nth level! oh, i really really wish i could be there on yours and jim's special day. like, this could be my chance to be a flower girl!
you've always known what you wanted in life, for a partner and for everything else. and i've watched you transform into someone very confident and determined since our days in denmark. i admire you for that. i want to be like you when i grow up ; ) and now that everything you've ever wanted is turning into reality, i can't help but to be as happy as you are. pa share ng happiness ha...
i love you mabethskie!
best wishes to you and jim
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
beautiful 28th
i woke up at half past 7 in the morning and just closed my eyes and waited for sleep to come again. but it didn't. so i just laid in bed and shut everything else around me...shut my senses and felt nothing. i just wanted to be nothing and to feel nothing.
maybe i fell asleep again...next time i checked the alarm, it was 11:30 am already. i got up, turned on my yahoo radio and enjoyed my one hour in the bathroom. aaahhh!!! i can't think of anything else better than having the luxury of time in the bathroom.
when i was finally done with my morning rituals, i took a look outside and....taraaannn!!!! the sky was clear blue...the sun shines on the snow-capped mountains and it's a wonderful sight...the outside world is pure white, the trees, rooftops...the lake is frozen white (if i only know how to skate : ()
sometimes, i still sit down and wonder what have i done right to deserve this beautiful sights all around me. i'm a lucky person! think about it...i'm actually a lucky alien : )
maybe i fell asleep again...next time i checked the alarm, it was 11:30 am already. i got up, turned on my yahoo radio and enjoyed my one hour in the bathroom. aaahhh!!! i can't think of anything else better than having the luxury of time in the bathroom.
when i was finally done with my morning rituals, i took a look outside and....taraaannn!!!! the sky was clear blue...the sun shines on the snow-capped mountains and it's a wonderful sight...the outside world is pure white, the trees, rooftops...the lake is frozen white (if i only know how to skate : ()
sometimes, i still sit down and wonder what have i done right to deserve this beautiful sights all around me. i'm a lucky person! think about it...i'm actually a lucky alien : )
Saturday, December 25, 2010
nalilito at nahihilo
kanina pa ako lakad ng lakad. kahit minus 23 degrees sa labas, sige lang. kasi ni confuse ko na naman ang sarili ko. kasi naman eh! ang kulit ko kasi. at tsaka, alam mo na...pag uminom ka ng aquakvit na 45.1% alcohol, dinagdagan pa ng sparkling wine at red wine, eh, ewan ko lang kung hindi ka maging makulit kagaya ko.
kaya naman, nakagawa na naman ako ng bagay ng sana hindi ko na lang ginawa. isang text message lang yun ha! pero na confuse na tuloy ako. wala na sana eh...okay na ako. nalagpasan ko na ang mourning and denial stages. nasa recovery stage na sana ako. ngayon, bumalik na naman ako sa "hoping" stage. ang tanga tanga ko talaga! gusto kong sakalin ang self ko.
sana nung ni open ni pandora ang box, lumipad na din ang hope na yan. kasi hindi sya helpful sa akin eh. nakakairita kayang umasa. ayoko namang umasa! kaya lang, hindi ko mapigilan minsan eh. nakakainis!
kaya maglalakad na lang ako. manigas man ang mga daliri ko sa kamay at paa. manigas man ang mukha ko. sana manigas na rin ang utak ko. at ang heart ko. para wala na akong maramdaman at tumigil na ang utak ko sa kakaisip ng kung anu-ano.
kaya naman, nakagawa na naman ako ng bagay ng sana hindi ko na lang ginawa. isang text message lang yun ha! pero na confuse na tuloy ako. wala na sana eh...okay na ako. nalagpasan ko na ang mourning and denial stages. nasa recovery stage na sana ako. ngayon, bumalik na naman ako sa "hoping" stage. ang tanga tanga ko talaga! gusto kong sakalin ang self ko.
sana nung ni open ni pandora ang box, lumipad na din ang hope na yan. kasi hindi sya helpful sa akin eh. nakakairita kayang umasa. ayoko namang umasa! kaya lang, hindi ko mapigilan minsan eh. nakakainis!
kaya maglalakad na lang ako. manigas man ang mga daliri ko sa kamay at paa. manigas man ang mukha ko. sana manigas na rin ang utak ko. at ang heart ko. para wala na akong maramdaman at tumigil na ang utak ko sa kakaisip ng kung anu-ano.
Thursday, December 23, 2010
yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus
there are just some things that we can't outgrow....
--------------------------------------------------------------
Newsman Francis Pharcellus Church wrote The Sun's response to Virginia.
Eight-year-old Virginia O'Hanlon wrote a letter to the editor of New York's Sun, and the quick response was printed as an unsigned editorial Sept. 21, 1897. The work of veteran newsman Francis Pharcellus Church has since become history's most reprinted newspaper editorial, appearing in part or whole in dozens of languages in books, movies, and other editorials, and on posters and stamps.
"DEAR EDITOR: I am 8 years old.
"Some of my little friends say there is no Santa Claus.
"Papa says, 'If you see it in THE SUN it's so.'
"Please tell me the truth; is there a Santa Claus?
"VIRGINIA O'HANLON.
"115 WEST NINETY-FIFTH STREET."
VIRGINIA, your little friends are wrong. They have been affected by the skepticism of a skeptical age. They do not believe except [what] they see. They think that nothing can be which is not comprehensible by their little minds. All minds, Virginia, whether they be men's or children's, are little. In this great universe of ours man is a mere insect, an ant, in his intellect, as compared with the boundless world about him, as measured by the intelligence capable of grasping the whole of truth and knowledge.
Yes, VIRGINIA, there is a Santa Claus. He exists as certainly as love and generosity and devotion exist, and you know that they abound and give to your life its highest beauty and joy. Alas! how dreary would be the world if there were no Santa Claus. It would be as dreary as if there were no VIRGINIAS. There would be no childlike faith then, no poetry, no romance to make tolerable this existence. We should have no enjoyment, except in sense and sight. The eternal light with which childhood fills the world would be extinguished.
Not believe in Santa Claus! You might as well not believe in fairies! You might get your papa to hire men to watch in all the chimneys on Christmas Eve to catch Santa Claus, but even if they did not see Santa Claus coming down, what would that prove? Nobody sees Santa Claus, but that is no sign that there is no Santa Claus. The most real things in the world are those that neither children nor men can see. Did you ever see fairies dancing on the lawn? Of course not, but that's no proof that they are not there. Nobody can conceive or imagine all the wonders there are unseen and unseeable in the world.
You may tear apart the baby's rattle and see what makes the noise inside, but there is a veil covering the unseen world which not the strongest man, nor even the united strength of all the strongest men that ever lived, could tear apart. Only faith, fancy, poetry, love, romance, can push aside that curtain and view and picture the supernal beauty and glory beyond. Is it all real? Ah, VIRGINIA, in all this world there is nothing else real and abiding.
No Santa Claus! Thank God! he lives, and he lives forever. A thousand years from now, Virginia, nay, ten times ten thousand years from now, he will continue to make glad the heart of childhood.
--------------------------------------------------------------
Newsman Francis Pharcellus Church wrote The Sun's response to Virginia.
Eight-year-old Virginia O'Hanlon wrote a letter to the editor of New York's Sun, and the quick response was printed as an unsigned editorial Sept. 21, 1897. The work of veteran newsman Francis Pharcellus Church has since become history's most reprinted newspaper editorial, appearing in part or whole in dozens of languages in books, movies, and other editorials, and on posters and stamps.
"DEAR EDITOR: I am 8 years old.
"Some of my little friends say there is no Santa Claus.
"Papa says, 'If you see it in THE SUN it's so.'
"Please tell me the truth; is there a Santa Claus?
"VIRGINIA O'HANLON.
"115 WEST NINETY-FIFTH STREET."
VIRGINIA, your little friends are wrong. They have been affected by the skepticism of a skeptical age. They do not believe except [what] they see. They think that nothing can be which is not comprehensible by their little minds. All minds, Virginia, whether they be men's or children's, are little. In this great universe of ours man is a mere insect, an ant, in his intellect, as compared with the boundless world about him, as measured by the intelligence capable of grasping the whole of truth and knowledge.
Yes, VIRGINIA, there is a Santa Claus. He exists as certainly as love and generosity and devotion exist, and you know that they abound and give to your life its highest beauty and joy. Alas! how dreary would be the world if there were no Santa Claus. It would be as dreary as if there were no VIRGINIAS. There would be no childlike faith then, no poetry, no romance to make tolerable this existence. We should have no enjoyment, except in sense and sight. The eternal light with which childhood fills the world would be extinguished.
Not believe in Santa Claus! You might as well not believe in fairies! You might get your papa to hire men to watch in all the chimneys on Christmas Eve to catch Santa Claus, but even if they did not see Santa Claus coming down, what would that prove? Nobody sees Santa Claus, but that is no sign that there is no Santa Claus. The most real things in the world are those that neither children nor men can see. Did you ever see fairies dancing on the lawn? Of course not, but that's no proof that they are not there. Nobody can conceive or imagine all the wonders there are unseen and unseeable in the world.
You may tear apart the baby's rattle and see what makes the noise inside, but there is a veil covering the unseen world which not the strongest man, nor even the united strength of all the strongest men that ever lived, could tear apart. Only faith, fancy, poetry, love, romance, can push aside that curtain and view and picture the supernal beauty and glory beyond. Is it all real? Ah, VIRGINIA, in all this world there is nothing else real and abiding.
No Santa Claus! Thank God! he lives, and he lives forever. A thousand years from now, Virginia, nay, ten times ten thousand years from now, he will continue to make glad the heart of childhood.
biente tres
second day here at the cottage. i got up as early as 8 to take Scott for a walk. i should've washed my face and brushed my teeth before going out...but i thought of going back to bed as soon as our cockerpoo is done with his morning rituals.
my senses awakened as soon as i stepped out of the door. the morning air and the -21 degrees invigorated my sleepy kokote. after 20 minutes of enduring the cold and feeling (or not feeling) my numb face, i decided to head back towards the cottage. ah, it was comforting to feel warm again.
i made cereals for myself and a slice of bread for Felix, and together with Scott, we let ourselves be entertained by NRKsuper as we wait for everyone else at the cottage to wake up.
good morning, biente tres of deciembre!
my senses awakened as soon as i stepped out of the door. the morning air and the -21 degrees invigorated my sleepy kokote. after 20 minutes of enduring the cold and feeling (or not feeling) my numb face, i decided to head back towards the cottage. ah, it was comforting to feel warm again.
i made cereals for myself and a slice of bread for Felix, and together with Scott, we let ourselves be entertained by NRKsuper as we wait for everyone else at the cottage to wake up.
good morning, biente tres of deciembre!
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
roadtrip to Kvitfjell
i am celebrating christmas eve with the Kvamme's. third year in a row and i'm sure it's going to be another happy and dramatic night for everyone.
but before everything else, before looking forward to decorating the christmas tree or making christmas cookies or debating with myself whether to try again to ski or not to ski...before any of these comes into my mind, i always look forward for the drive to the cottage.
in 2008, i was amazed by the mountain of gifts that Finn-Einar and Kjersti had to fit in the car to bring to Kvitfjell. aside from the gifts, they also had to squeeze in our luggage. plus, us! the five of us and kuya Oscar! i remember how funny it was to be seated between Rebecca and Felix at the backseat, with bags and stuffs on our laps as our roadtrip to Kvitfjell began. as Finn-Einar took the driver's seat, he took a look at the three of us at the back and sighed. and i blurted out "oh! this is so exciting!" and he said, you are the most positive person i've ever met. anyway, the four-hour drive on the dark, long and winding road to the cottage was indeed fun for us but not for kuya Oscar. poor kuya...
in 2009, i missed the car ride because i took the bus to Ringebu instead. but i didn't miss how Kjersti got pissed off when she couldn't shove in the last small packages in her volvo.
2010. the boys drove in Finn-Einar's parents' car and us girls and Scott drove with Kjersti. the same shoving and squeezing of packages problem, in two cars, occurred. but this year has been the most comfortable ride so far : ) it was so cool to sit at the back with all the bags and gifts by my side and Scott on my lap. i had more room to wiggle my legs! yubbeee! we had fun singing along to WHAM's "last christmas", eating cheese tacos and taking turns with Scott. though, at the last hour and 30 minutes of the trip, i slept like a baby.
three years of driving to Kvitfjell for christmas. three years of roadtrip fun. three years that i'm going to miss...
but before everything else, before looking forward to decorating the christmas tree or making christmas cookies or debating with myself whether to try again to ski or not to ski...before any of these comes into my mind, i always look forward for the drive to the cottage.
in 2008, i was amazed by the mountain of gifts that Finn-Einar and Kjersti had to fit in the car to bring to Kvitfjell. aside from the gifts, they also had to squeeze in our luggage. plus, us! the five of us and kuya Oscar! i remember how funny it was to be seated between Rebecca and Felix at the backseat, with bags and stuffs on our laps as our roadtrip to Kvitfjell began. as Finn-Einar took the driver's seat, he took a look at the three of us at the back and sighed. and i blurted out "oh! this is so exciting!" and he said, you are the most positive person i've ever met. anyway, the four-hour drive on the dark, long and winding road to the cottage was indeed fun for us but not for kuya Oscar. poor kuya...
in 2009, i missed the car ride because i took the bus to Ringebu instead. but i didn't miss how Kjersti got pissed off when she couldn't shove in the last small packages in her volvo.
2010. the boys drove in Finn-Einar's parents' car and us girls and Scott drove with Kjersti. the same shoving and squeezing of packages problem, in two cars, occurred. but this year has been the most comfortable ride so far : ) it was so cool to sit at the back with all the bags and gifts by my side and Scott on my lap. i had more room to wiggle my legs! yubbeee! we had fun singing along to WHAM's "last christmas", eating cheese tacos and taking turns with Scott. though, at the last hour and 30 minutes of the trip, i slept like a baby.
three years of driving to Kvitfjell for christmas. three years of roadtrip fun. three years that i'm going to miss...
Monday, December 20, 2010
am i dying?
i live a very simple, quiet, ordinary life. i am nice to nice people and i try to be nice to mean people. i am not a saint. i have my bad and devilish episodes. but i fight it out and try to be good.
however, i am not comfortable in situations when people are nice to me. i mean, super extra nice, for that matter. i have a big "WHY?" written on my forehead. i can't take it when people are good to me when i know that i don't deserve their kindness. it makes me feel guilty and freaky. like, i am on a terminal state, and they are being nice to me because they pity me?
aaahhh! paranoia!
okay, i should be thankful for their goodness. and I AM THANKFUL. really!
....but it's still freaking me out...
however, i am not comfortable in situations when people are nice to me. i mean, super extra nice, for that matter. i have a big "WHY?" written on my forehead. i can't take it when people are good to me when i know that i don't deserve their kindness. it makes me feel guilty and freaky. like, i am on a terminal state, and they are being nice to me because they pity me?
aaahhh! paranoia!
okay, i should be thankful for their goodness. and I AM THANKFUL. really!
....but it's still freaking me out...
Sunday, December 19, 2010
i flew a balloon for you
kuya Oscar,
howdy? happy as ever, i'm sure : )
it has been three months kuya...i still miss you every single day of my existence. and i love you. so, to send my over-flowing love for you, i flew a yellow balloon up to the sky, hoping that it will reach you, wherever you are.
kuya, you know, Scott is a very nice friend too. but i am so scared to love him too much because i don't want to feel the pain when the time to say goodbye comes. i love him but i stay away from the borderline.
i love you, kuya O! you have my unlimited love, my puppy love, forever and ever...
howdy? happy as ever, i'm sure : )
it has been three months kuya...i still miss you every single day of my existence. and i love you. so, to send my over-flowing love for you, i flew a yellow balloon up to the sky, hoping that it will reach you, wherever you are.
kuya, you know, Scott is a very nice friend too. but i am so scared to love him too much because i don't want to feel the pain when the time to say goodbye comes. i love him but i stay away from the borderline.
i love you, kuya O! you have my unlimited love, my puppy love, forever and ever...
Thursday, December 16, 2010
early christmas gift! yubeee!
i can't contain my happiness! i just got this letter from the UiS...
--------------------------------------------------------
Joan Estrellanes Mucho
Prestestegen 17
Stryn 6783
Norway
Our ref.: 20110185/MBR/HR/JK Letter sent by e-mail only
Date: 15 December 2010
APPLICATION FOR ADMISSION TO NORWEGIAN LANGUAGE AND CULTURE COURSE AT THE UNIVERSITY OF STAVANGER,
ACADEMIC YEAR 2011/2012
Dear Applicant,
The University of Stavanger has evaluated your preliminary application for admission to the Norwegian Language and Culture Course starting in August 2011. We are happy to inform you that you have been chosen to take part in the final round of the application process. We received a record number of 897 applications within the deadline. Of these, 399 applicants have been qualified and invited to send in full documentation and Final Application Form.
Kindly read the instructions carefully before you fill in the Final Application Form. Please, do not send an electronic version by e-mail. Be careful to date and sign the Final Application Form and send the complete hard copy of your application package by ordinary mail to:
University of Stavanger
International Admissions
N-4036 Stavanger
NORWAY
-----------------------------------------------------------
huff! i can't breath! and my mind is blank...
joanna marie, que sera sera......
--------------------------------------------------------
Joan Estrellanes Mucho
Prestestegen 17
Stryn 6783
Norway
Our ref.: 20110185/MBR/HR/JK Letter sent by e-mail only
Date: 15 December 2010
APPLICATION FOR ADMISSION TO NORWEGIAN LANGUAGE AND CULTURE COURSE AT THE UNIVERSITY OF STAVANGER,
ACADEMIC YEAR 2011/2012
Dear Applicant,
The University of Stavanger has evaluated your preliminary application for admission to the Norwegian Language and Culture Course starting in August 2011. We are happy to inform you that you have been chosen to take part in the final round of the application process. We received a record number of 897 applications within the deadline. Of these, 399 applicants have been qualified and invited to send in full documentation and Final Application Form.
Kindly read the instructions carefully before you fill in the Final Application Form. Please, do not send an electronic version by e-mail. Be careful to date and sign the Final Application Form and send the complete hard copy of your application package by ordinary mail to:
University of Stavanger
International Admissions
N-4036 Stavanger
NORWAY
-----------------------------------------------------------
huff! i can't breath! and my mind is blank...
joanna marie, que sera sera......
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
reminders
i found this piece of paper about instructions for life while i was rummaging with my old stuffs. it has been a long time since i have read it...i thought of posting it here so i'll have an online checklist.
life's little instructions
sing in the shower. love deeply and passionately. you might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely. treat everyone you meet like you want to be treated. watch a sunrise at least once a year. strive for excellence, not perfection. in disagreements, fight fairly (no name calling). don't judge people by their relatives. talk slowly but quickly. when someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, smile and ask, "why do you want to know?". remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk. say "bless you" when you hear someone sneeze. don't believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want. plant a tree on your birthday. learn three clean jokes. compliment three people everyday. never waste an opportunity to tell someone you love. never laugh at anyone's dreams. leave the toilet seat in the down position. when you lose, don't lose the lesson. remember the three R's: respect for self, respect for others, responsibility for all your actions. don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship. when you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it. smile when picking up the phone. marry a woman/man you love to talk to. as you get older, her/his conversational skills will be as important as any other. spend some time alone. open your arms to change, but don't let go of your values. remember that silence is sometimes the best answer. read more books and watch less tv. live a good honorable life. then when you get older and think back, you'll get to enjoy it a second time. trust in god but lock your car. a loving atmosphere in your home is so important. do all you can to create a tranquil harmonious home. in disagreements with loved ones, deal with the current situation. don't bring up the past. read between the lines. leave everything a little better than you found it. keep it simple. think big thoughts but relish small pleasures. become the most positive and enthusiastic person you know. floss your teeth. be forgiving of yourself and others. say "thank you" a lot. memorize your favorite poem. say "please" a lot. avoid negative people. wear polished shoes. buy whatever kids are selling on card tables in their front yards. remember other people's birthdays. when you say "i love you", mean it. commit yourself to constant improvement. have a firm handshake. look people in the eye. be the first to say "hello". give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully. return all the things you borrow. make new friends but cherish the old ones. keep secrets. sing in a choir. plant flowers every spring. take responsibility for every area of your life. have a dog. always accept outstretched hands. stop blaming others. when you say "i'm sorry", look the person in the eye. be engaged at least six months before you get married. believe in love at first sight. wave at kids on school buses. be there when people need you. don't expect life to be fair. never underestimate the power of love. drink champagne for no reason at all. live your life as an explanation. don't be afraid to say "i made a mistake". don't be afraid to say "i don't know". compliment even small improvements. keep your promise (no matter what). marry only for love. rekindle old friendships. count your blessings. call your mother.
life's little instructions
sing in the shower. love deeply and passionately. you might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely. treat everyone you meet like you want to be treated. watch a sunrise at least once a year. strive for excellence, not perfection. in disagreements, fight fairly (no name calling). don't judge people by their relatives. talk slowly but quickly. when someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, smile and ask, "why do you want to know?". remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk. say "bless you" when you hear someone sneeze. don't believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want. plant a tree on your birthday. learn three clean jokes. compliment three people everyday. never waste an opportunity to tell someone you love. never laugh at anyone's dreams. leave the toilet seat in the down position. when you lose, don't lose the lesson. remember the three R's: respect for self, respect for others, responsibility for all your actions. don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship. when you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it. smile when picking up the phone. marry a woman/man you love to talk to. as you get older, her/his conversational skills will be as important as any other. spend some time alone. open your arms to change, but don't let go of your values. remember that silence is sometimes the best answer. read more books and watch less tv. live a good honorable life. then when you get older and think back, you'll get to enjoy it a second time. trust in god but lock your car. a loving atmosphere in your home is so important. do all you can to create a tranquil harmonious home. in disagreements with loved ones, deal with the current situation. don't bring up the past. read between the lines. leave everything a little better than you found it. keep it simple. think big thoughts but relish small pleasures. become the most positive and enthusiastic person you know. floss your teeth. be forgiving of yourself and others. say "thank you" a lot. memorize your favorite poem. say "please" a lot. avoid negative people. wear polished shoes. buy whatever kids are selling on card tables in their front yards. remember other people's birthdays. when you say "i love you", mean it. commit yourself to constant improvement. have a firm handshake. look people in the eye. be the first to say "hello". give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully. return all the things you borrow. make new friends but cherish the old ones. keep secrets. sing in a choir. plant flowers every spring. take responsibility for every area of your life. have a dog. always accept outstretched hands. stop blaming others. when you say "i'm sorry", look the person in the eye. be engaged at least six months before you get married. believe in love at first sight. wave at kids on school buses. be there when people need you. don't expect life to be fair. never underestimate the power of love. drink champagne for no reason at all. live your life as an explanation. don't be afraid to say "i made a mistake". don't be afraid to say "i don't know". compliment even small improvements. keep your promise (no matter what). marry only for love. rekindle old friendships. count your blessings. call your mother.
to do
i am, maybe, halfway of my mortality span, and things haven't been that bad. i didn't plan any of these things...well, opportunities came, i grabbed them. challenges provoked me and i faced them straight-off. good and bad weathers came and i weathered them all. people came into my life, i loved them with all my heart and they were gone. but i am still here. content with the ephemeral happiness and love that comes along my way.
for the time being though, i have short term "to do's"....(plan is such a tough word for me. it seems unattainable. "to do" is a couple of words which suit me just right. and it means, i'm really gonna do it!)
okay... here are my "to do" list when i get back home:
* learn how to play the guitar
top of the list. yes! i want to be able to play more songs other than "leaving on a jet plane" and "when you say nothing at all". i want to strum and pluck. music is a great part of what i am and i want to spend the rest of my life playing songs for myself and for everyone. jitters! i am excited as hell! mmmm...i need a good guitar and a brilliant guitarist! yamaha school of music, here i come...
* find a job
i want to get back to the corporate world. feel the adrenaline rush while trying to catch the deadline or trying to reach the sales target at the end of each month.
either that OR...
i'll find a job in a beach resort and wake up each morning feeling the sea breeze on my face...amanpulo is my target area. i wouldn't mind working in paradise. it would be bliss for me.
* get back on stage
if there's one thing that i am most passionate about, it's performing on stage. there is nothing more liberating than creating a character into shape and portraying it. it's cathartic. and i miss being someone else. i also miss the late night rehearsals and bonding with eccentric people.
* catch up with my family and friends
i will hug my mom and dad every minute of every day. just to make-up with the missed times.
i will be a real real friend to my friends. i don't want to be a cyber friend anymore.
* fall in-love
i've got so much love, running through my veins, going to waste (robbie williams)
anyway, those are the things that i'm looking forward to do when (and if) i get back home. somehow, i am looking forward to it. but i also feel sad when i think of leaving the place that have been home to me for a couple of years. especially when, if i only have a choice, this would be the place that i'd want to be my home.
for the time being though, i have short term "to do's"....(plan is such a tough word for me. it seems unattainable. "to do" is a couple of words which suit me just right. and it means, i'm really gonna do it!)
okay... here are my "to do" list when i get back home:
* learn how to play the guitar
top of the list. yes! i want to be able to play more songs other than "leaving on a jet plane" and "when you say nothing at all". i want to strum and pluck. music is a great part of what i am and i want to spend the rest of my life playing songs for myself and for everyone. jitters! i am excited as hell! mmmm...i need a good guitar and a brilliant guitarist! yamaha school of music, here i come...
* find a job
i want to get back to the corporate world. feel the adrenaline rush while trying to catch the deadline or trying to reach the sales target at the end of each month.
either that OR...
i'll find a job in a beach resort and wake up each morning feeling the sea breeze on my face...amanpulo is my target area. i wouldn't mind working in paradise. it would be bliss for me.
* get back on stage
if there's one thing that i am most passionate about, it's performing on stage. there is nothing more liberating than creating a character into shape and portraying it. it's cathartic. and i miss being someone else. i also miss the late night rehearsals and bonding with eccentric people.
* catch up with my family and friends
i will hug my mom and dad every minute of every day. just to make-up with the missed times.
i will be a real real friend to my friends. i don't want to be a cyber friend anymore.
* fall in-love
i've got so much love, running through my veins, going to waste (robbie williams)
anyway, those are the things that i'm looking forward to do when (and if) i get back home. somehow, i am looking forward to it. but i also feel sad when i think of leaving the place that have been home to me for a couple of years. especially when, if i only have a choice, this would be the place that i'd want to be my home.
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
so tangledly funny
tangled. a new disney animation which tickled and untangled my taxing state of mind. it was the perfect way to spend my sunday evening...i mean, together with rapunzel, eugene aka flynn rider, maximus, pascal and the mother witch, who definitely had the knack for fun, i laughed my heart out as i entered the world of dreams, dreaming and dreamers...
the characters are brutally cruel, viciously nice, naively amusing...i loved it!
falling without style
i could have died of shame right on the spot where i fell last sunday afternoon. why, of all places, would i slip, slide and fall on my butt straight down to a sprawling position, in front of the grocers? ugh! i managed to stand up as quickly as i could. but when i heard abigail's obscene laughter, i let out a terrifying fountain of tears. aby just couldn't contain her laughter, so i joined her in making fun of what just happened to me.
gosh, it hurt! my back and my butt. what's worse? when i woke up on a monday morning, i couldn't move my neck. it was so stiff that i wondered if i had a stroke or something. i started to cry again. it was so painful, for heavensakes! i started to call for my mother in the middle of my sobs.
i managed to go through the day turning my head along with my body on a 360 degrees everytime someone calls me or if i had to change direction. ugh! painful and annoying.
i am on my 2nd day of suffering. i can, at least, control myself not to cry. i am an expert in suffering in silence, so be it!
lesson: no matter how careful you are, you'd still get yourself hurt...never trust a slippery road. get yourself a spiky pair of shoes ; )
gosh, it hurt! my back and my butt. what's worse? when i woke up on a monday morning, i couldn't move my neck. it was so stiff that i wondered if i had a stroke or something. i started to cry again. it was so painful, for heavensakes! i started to call for my mother in the middle of my sobs.
i managed to go through the day turning my head along with my body on a 360 degrees everytime someone calls me or if i had to change direction. ugh! painful and annoying.
i am on my 2nd day of suffering. i can, at least, control myself not to cry. i am an expert in suffering in silence, so be it!
lesson: no matter how careful you are, you'd still get yourself hurt...never trust a slippery road. get yourself a spiky pair of shoes ; )
Monday, December 13, 2010
a call from the ghost of the past
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
i can't stop laughing! i mean, really! oh, this is bad!
i got a call from the dark angel. the moment i heard the dark angel's voice, i just laughed. it was like a BIG joke! i had no pretenses at all...i just let my lungs and esophagus out! i couldn't help it!
i thought the dark angel was smart enough to read the signs posted on the silent wall a million light years ago. but the dark angel sounded like nothing happened. like the dark angel didn't cheat on me. like the dark angel didn't hurt me.
oh, the dark angel and his lies...poor thing...
who had the last laugh now?
i can't stop laughing! i mean, really! oh, this is bad!
i got a call from the dark angel. the moment i heard the dark angel's voice, i just laughed. it was like a BIG joke! i had no pretenses at all...i just let my lungs and esophagus out! i couldn't help it!
i thought the dark angel was smart enough to read the signs posted on the silent wall a million light years ago. but the dark angel sounded like nothing happened. like the dark angel didn't cheat on me. like the dark angel didn't hurt me.
oh, the dark angel and his lies...poor thing...
who had the last laugh now?
Friday, December 10, 2010
tantrum attack
my patience has been wearing off since yesterday. i know that it's me and only me. the people, pets, snow...everything around me for that matter, move around in a spontaneous manner. but i, me, myself and joanna marie, has been acting erratically. even the tiniest thing annoys me. even when felix bumped on me (which he always do, and i would normally bump back on him), annoyed me.
i was trying to keep myself together. really...
but today, i lost it. i felt like, everything around me was spinning so fast that i can hardly take a grip, the noise was unbearable, my legs were tired, my body just wanted to slouch on a hill of snow, i was restless...
the next thing i knew, i was in my bathroom, stomping my feet on the floor like a 3-year old kid would do, throwing my dirty clothes on the floor, groaning, almost on the verge of crying.
it's a shame, i know. that at this age, i still have tantrum attacks. but i can't help it. my mind was totally blocked, i couldn't think anymore. something evilish inside me wanted to be unleashed. to just go crazy! throw things! shout! cry!
urgh! i need to collect my self-control and rebuild my patience. now!
i was trying to keep myself together. really...
but today, i lost it. i felt like, everything around me was spinning so fast that i can hardly take a grip, the noise was unbearable, my legs were tired, my body just wanted to slouch on a hill of snow, i was restless...
the next thing i knew, i was in my bathroom, stomping my feet on the floor like a 3-year old kid would do, throwing my dirty clothes on the floor, groaning, almost on the verge of crying.
it's a shame, i know. that at this age, i still have tantrum attacks. but i can't help it. my mind was totally blocked, i couldn't think anymore. something evilish inside me wanted to be unleashed. to just go crazy! throw things! shout! cry!
urgh! i need to collect my self-control and rebuild my patience. now!
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
to eternity and beyond
today, my vampire Damon Salvatore celebrates his 520th something birthday. another year to eternity and so many forevermore's...
if Damon will just show up and turn me into a vampire, then i will gain all hopes on my "vampiric fairytale" obsession, and then and only then, can i end my story with ... "and they lived happily ever after"...
Damon, don't make me wait for long. i am in distress, so please be my hero ; ) i don't want to be an alien anymore. make me a vampire now, please...
happy birthday, my vampire. let's have a bloody toast to that!
Monday, December 6, 2010
ace is back!
yehey! after a month and 10 days, my laptop is finally back...and the keyboard is fixed! yubeee! i am not being punished anymore. meaning, i have been good : ) hehehe
the first thing i did when i turned it on, was view the pictures in my files. oh, i missed those pictures of kuya Oscar, the moments with friends, pictures of Andrè...i smile when i look back at all those happy memories.
i'll be very careful with ace from now on...not just throw it around my bathroom or anywhere else ; (
i'll be good...i will be good.
the first thing i did when i turned it on, was view the pictures in my files. oh, i missed those pictures of kuya Oscar, the moments with friends, pictures of Andrè...i smile when i look back at all those happy memories.
i'll be very careful with ace from now on...not just throw it around my bathroom or anywhere else ; (
i'll be good...i will be good.
Sunday, December 5, 2010
tea, snow and tears
i thought i was way past the crying stage already. but i was wrong.
as i wrapped my fingers around the warm cup of tea, i sat by my glass door and gazed at the falling snow. it was marvelous! i enjoy moments when i practice the art of doing nothing. i felt at peace by just looking at the snow-covered ground and trees.
then i felt a stab in my chest. i suddenly missed Andrè. i miss him a lot. but it's all that i can do now. i'll just miss him. because i can't do anything about it.
my tears fell on my cheeks as silently as the snowflakes fell on the ground.
as i wrapped my fingers around the warm cup of tea, i sat by my glass door and gazed at the falling snow. it was marvelous! i enjoy moments when i practice the art of doing nothing. i felt at peace by just looking at the snow-covered ground and trees.
then i felt a stab in my chest. i suddenly missed Andrè. i miss him a lot. but it's all that i can do now. i'll just miss him. because i can't do anything about it.
my tears fell on my cheeks as silently as the snowflakes fell on the ground.
Saturday, December 4, 2010
i love it!
woke up at 9: 30
had a long shower
took a short walk with scott
took a long walk in the forest...under the shower of snow. i am jubilant!
had a date with my vampire damon the whole afternoon
cuddled with scott
babysitting...Felix, Scott and Joanna Marie...we are the happiest gang alive!
kjersti and finn-einar left a bottle of wine for me! åh! life is beautiful! wine! wine! wine! mine! mine! mine!
took scott out to pee. it was nice watching scott play with snow. his first winter here on earth : )
marvelled the greatest feeling of setting foot on the soft snow-covered ground. it felt like heaven!
felix and i are having lasagne for dinner while watching playhouse disney. oh, childhood rewind! i love it!
december 4, you are the best day of my life! i love you! i wish everyday is the 4th of december...
had a long shower
took a short walk with scott
took a long walk in the forest...under the shower of snow. i am jubilant!
had a date with my vampire damon the whole afternoon
cuddled with scott
babysitting...Felix, Scott and Joanna Marie...we are the happiest gang alive!
kjersti and finn-einar left a bottle of wine for me! åh! life is beautiful! wine! wine! wine! mine! mine! mine!
took scott out to pee. it was nice watching scott play with snow. his first winter here on earth : )
marvelled the greatest feeling of setting foot on the soft snow-covered ground. it felt like heaven!
felix and i are having lasagne for dinner while watching playhouse disney. oh, childhood rewind! i love it!
december 4, you are the best day of my life! i love you! i wish everyday is the 4th of december...
the secret war continues
i refused to touch, or have anything to do, with flour and yeast for a year.
i discovered that i didn't have a knack for baking. i remember how embarrassed i was when i first made my pizza dough. (ugh! okay, i want to erase that memory) but i didn't take the hint that time. i baked a bread which turned out to be more disastrous than the pizza dough. although i completely shrank into my bones when Kjersti found it out, i managed to laugh it off with her. she made me feel better by saying that "it's not you, Joan. it's the yeast". aha!
so i didn't give up. i refused to give up. i wouldn't just throw my hands up in the air and surrender to the curse of the yeast...and flour. it became an obsession. an obsession to win the battle over those molecules that turn into bread, cakes and pastries, when handled by the right person.
but after a couple of months of making a stone-bread out of yeast and flour, i finally took the hint. i lost the battle. i accepted my defeat whole-heartedly. from then on, i would just nod at the box of yeast and flour everytime i open the cupboard. i can just imagine those molecules grinning at me! hmp!
it has been, more or less, a year now, since the battle ended. but last thursday, i accidentally came into the baking page of my menu guide and i suddenly felt the urge to start a fight! then and there, i asked aby if i could spend the friday night at her place and bake a cake. she immediately agreed. oh, i was excited!
facing the war with my arch-enemies just gave me an adrenaline rush! i was restless. i was energized and hopping all day. so when evening came, and kjersti and finn-einar were home, i put on my best "homey" dress and walked down to the battlefield.
first things first: i dropped by aby's place and we went to the shop together. i meticulously chose the ingredients to the simplest chocolate cake recipe that i found on the menu guide. half-mindedly talking to myself, aby and the boxes of granulated sugar as we go through the aisle for the baking stuffs at the grocers. half of my mind was trying to picture out how the chocolate cake would look like when it's all done. i smiled.
so, when we had everything that we needed in the cart, we paid for it and went back to Walhalla, where the battle took place. (grin!)
i totally made the kitchen looked like a battlefield. in fairness, i handled all the ingredients with extra care. i mixed this and that and poured my heart and love into it. just like a real warrior ; )
with the oven set to 175 degrees, i poured the mixture from the mixing bowl to the cake former and put it in the oven and took a rest for 20 minutes, as i await for the result.
i danced my jitterness off. 35 minutes was like a lifetime. so when my timer rang, i literally ran to the kitchen and opened the oven! my hyperactivity melted down as fast as a shooting star appears and disappears in my sight when i saw what's in the cake former. i got disoriented. it wasn't the cake that i pictured out in my mind. i even wondered if it was a cake at all. it was....indescribable! i wouldn't and i couldn't even touch it. so i just stared at it.
aby noticed my silence and came to the kitchen. when she saw what i was looking at, she burst into a hideous laughter. her laughter awakened me and i snapped back into reality. i pulled out the cake former from the oven, set it into the counter and stared at it again, unbelievingly! then i let out a tummy-aching laughter too. aby and i tried to describe it. i meant the "cake". it looked like a volcano which erupted, and then you can see the crater. no! it looked like the moon! no! oh! it was anything but a cake!
when our laughters subsided, i stared at the "cake" again and knowingly accepted my defeat. as i threw it out in the waste basket, i resolved to myself, that i will never, ever, start a fight, which i know, i am bound to loose. there are wars that are worth fighting for. and the battle with yeast and flour is not one of them.
i discovered that i didn't have a knack for baking. i remember how embarrassed i was when i first made my pizza dough. (ugh! okay, i want to erase that memory) but i didn't take the hint that time. i baked a bread which turned out to be more disastrous than the pizza dough. although i completely shrank into my bones when Kjersti found it out, i managed to laugh it off with her. she made me feel better by saying that "it's not you, Joan. it's the yeast". aha!
so i didn't give up. i refused to give up. i wouldn't just throw my hands up in the air and surrender to the curse of the yeast...and flour. it became an obsession. an obsession to win the battle over those molecules that turn into bread, cakes and pastries, when handled by the right person.
but after a couple of months of making a stone-bread out of yeast and flour, i finally took the hint. i lost the battle. i accepted my defeat whole-heartedly. from then on, i would just nod at the box of yeast and flour everytime i open the cupboard. i can just imagine those molecules grinning at me! hmp!
it has been, more or less, a year now, since the battle ended. but last thursday, i accidentally came into the baking page of my menu guide and i suddenly felt the urge to start a fight! then and there, i asked aby if i could spend the friday night at her place and bake a cake. she immediately agreed. oh, i was excited!
facing the war with my arch-enemies just gave me an adrenaline rush! i was restless. i was energized and hopping all day. so when evening came, and kjersti and finn-einar were home, i put on my best "homey" dress and walked down to the battlefield.
first things first: i dropped by aby's place and we went to the shop together. i meticulously chose the ingredients to the simplest chocolate cake recipe that i found on the menu guide. half-mindedly talking to myself, aby and the boxes of granulated sugar as we go through the aisle for the baking stuffs at the grocers. half of my mind was trying to picture out how the chocolate cake would look like when it's all done. i smiled.
so, when we had everything that we needed in the cart, we paid for it and went back to Walhalla, where the battle took place. (grin!)
i totally made the kitchen looked like a battlefield. in fairness, i handled all the ingredients with extra care. i mixed this and that and poured my heart and love into it. just like a real warrior ; )
with the oven set to 175 degrees, i poured the mixture from the mixing bowl to the cake former and put it in the oven and took a rest for 20 minutes, as i await for the result.
i danced my jitterness off. 35 minutes was like a lifetime. so when my timer rang, i literally ran to the kitchen and opened the oven! my hyperactivity melted down as fast as a shooting star appears and disappears in my sight when i saw what's in the cake former. i got disoriented. it wasn't the cake that i pictured out in my mind. i even wondered if it was a cake at all. it was....indescribable! i wouldn't and i couldn't even touch it. so i just stared at it.
aby noticed my silence and came to the kitchen. when she saw what i was looking at, she burst into a hideous laughter. her laughter awakened me and i snapped back into reality. i pulled out the cake former from the oven, set it into the counter and stared at it again, unbelievingly! then i let out a tummy-aching laughter too. aby and i tried to describe it. i meant the "cake". it looked like a volcano which erupted, and then you can see the crater. no! it looked like the moon! no! oh! it was anything but a cake!
when our laughters subsided, i stared at the "cake" again and knowingly accepted my defeat. as i threw it out in the waste basket, i resolved to myself, that i will never, ever, start a fight, which i know, i am bound to loose. there are wars that are worth fighting for. and the battle with yeast and flour is not one of them.
Thursday, December 2, 2010
sweet little orc
felix has given up barne tv these past days. he's been fascinated with "the voice" channel instead, but i don't want him to watch it. he's only 6 and some of the music videos are not suited for a 6-year old. we always argue everytime we come home from school. he wants "the voice" and i want "cartoon network". one time, i was so tired to argue with him that i gave in to his demands. when i switched the channel to "the voice", bruno mars' "just the way you are" was playing. it happens to be my favorite song for this season, so i ecstatically jumped and sang along with the song.
this afternoon, it was the same scenario. i was full-handed when we got home. aby came for a visit, i had to fetch some logs and make a fire to warm up the house, i had to pee, i had to take scott out to pee, i had to take out the plates from the dishwasher and i had to prepare dinner. so felix was happy as he sat quietly with his lego stuffs in the living room while tuned in to "the voice". as aby and i made dinner, i checked on him once in a while, and he said to me, "don't worry joan, i'm not watching the videos, i'm just listening to the songs". yeah, right!
i called him when dinner was ready. after a couple of excuses, he finally joined me and aby at the dining table. we had small talks...talking to felix with my elementary-level norsk and shifting to tagalog when i talked to aby. in the middle of dinner, he sat straight up, and said, "it's your favorite song, joan". i was surprised because i didn't even hear the song at first. he stood up from his chair and said, "i'll turn up the volume so you can listen to it". he went to the living room and did just that. i was flattered and i said a thousand thanks to him. he came back to the table and finished eating his food. after he said "tak for mad" he went back to his lego and "the voice".
aby was surprised to see how sweet felix is. i know, i know. his little gestures can be overwhelming sometimes. he is my sweet little orc. i never thought he pays any attention to me when i tell him my favorite songs, things or food. but he does. last summer, he showed up in my room with a handful of dandelions because he remembered that yellow is my favorite color. so he thought, i might like dandelions. and i did! one time, when i suddenly burst into tears in the grocery store, he walked out on me, but came back with my favorite strawberry-vanilla ice cream and said "i picked this out for you so you'll stop crying". he would patiently walk with me down to the library (even in a freezing minus 15 temp) because he knows that i love books and i just want to be surrounded by them.
ah, he's just full of surprises....my sweet little orc : )
this afternoon, it was the same scenario. i was full-handed when we got home. aby came for a visit, i had to fetch some logs and make a fire to warm up the house, i had to pee, i had to take scott out to pee, i had to take out the plates from the dishwasher and i had to prepare dinner. so felix was happy as he sat quietly with his lego stuffs in the living room while tuned in to "the voice". as aby and i made dinner, i checked on him once in a while, and he said to me, "don't worry joan, i'm not watching the videos, i'm just listening to the songs". yeah, right!
i called him when dinner was ready. after a couple of excuses, he finally joined me and aby at the dining table. we had small talks...talking to felix with my elementary-level norsk and shifting to tagalog when i talked to aby. in the middle of dinner, he sat straight up, and said, "it's your favorite song, joan". i was surprised because i didn't even hear the song at first. he stood up from his chair and said, "i'll turn up the volume so you can listen to it". he went to the living room and did just that. i was flattered and i said a thousand thanks to him. he came back to the table and finished eating his food. after he said "tak for mad" he went back to his lego and "the voice".
aby was surprised to see how sweet felix is. i know, i know. his little gestures can be overwhelming sometimes. he is my sweet little orc. i never thought he pays any attention to me when i tell him my favorite songs, things or food. but he does. last summer, he showed up in my room with a handful of dandelions because he remembered that yellow is my favorite color. so he thought, i might like dandelions. and i did! one time, when i suddenly burst into tears in the grocery store, he walked out on me, but came back with my favorite strawberry-vanilla ice cream and said "i picked this out for you so you'll stop crying". he would patiently walk with me down to the library (even in a freezing minus 15 temp) because he knows that i love books and i just want to be surrounded by them.
ah, he's just full of surprises....my sweet little orc : )
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
december = vampire
i've noticed that almost everyone i know on facebook, posted a christmas something on their walls. well, they might be really looking forward for the yuletide season. please, i didn't mean to be the grinch here. i just wanted to be different. haha!
it's confirmed. i am a vampire addict. on the first day of the christmas season, my eyes have been feasting on the gorgeous bloodsucker, damon! i just love him! his blue-gray eyes, his half-teasing smile, his devilish ways and most of all, his sarcasm. there is nothing more cute and charming than a vampire's sarcasm. and i love it! i love him!
i find it attractive to be involved with a 520-something year old guy who has been through different eras, who has survived two world wars, who has been there when the beatles were on the top of the world, who has gone through a century and a half loving the same woman. yes, that's damon. no matter how he inflicts misery to the lives of human and other vampires around him, he's still good at heart.
when the day is over and i am all by myself in my tiny nook, the vampires keep me company. my heart jumps when the scene is too scary, so i keep my blanket on the level of my eyes. scaring myself has become a hobby lately. hmmm...vampires, bring it on!
i want damon to turn me. i want to spend an eternity with a vampire like him and be compelled by his lovely sarcasm. i want to be under his spell...to shut off all human within me and enter a new realm of existence. to see the world in another perspective.
i want to be a vampire. a bite from damon would be the greatest gift i can ever have this yuletide season.
it's confirmed. i am a vampire addict. on the first day of the christmas season, my eyes have been feasting on the gorgeous bloodsucker, damon! i just love him! his blue-gray eyes, his half-teasing smile, his devilish ways and most of all, his sarcasm. there is nothing more cute and charming than a vampire's sarcasm. and i love it! i love him!
i find it attractive to be involved with a 520-something year old guy who has been through different eras, who has survived two world wars, who has been there when the beatles were on the top of the world, who has gone through a century and a half loving the same woman. yes, that's damon. no matter how he inflicts misery to the lives of human and other vampires around him, he's still good at heart.
when the day is over and i am all by myself in my tiny nook, the vampires keep me company. my heart jumps when the scene is too scary, so i keep my blanket on the level of my eyes. scaring myself has become a hobby lately. hmmm...vampires, bring it on!
i want damon to turn me. i want to spend an eternity with a vampire like him and be compelled by his lovely sarcasm. i want to be under his spell...to shut off all human within me and enter a new realm of existence. to see the world in another perspective.
i want to be a vampire. a bite from damon would be the greatest gift i can ever have this yuletide season.
okay, ready ako ren nga i-storya
namuno ko sa nagligad ko nga blog nga nagapati ako sa karma. amo ra tulad, i storya ko ren kung naga gapati ako nga gin-karma gd man ako.
2 weeks ago, may nakilala ako nga laki. pagkatapos nga mag chat sa ym, daw nawili lang kami ka storya, gintao na ang number na. ako man nga hangag, gintao ko man akon number. wara gani guro sangka oras namangkot tana kung pwede kuno tana katawag. ti hambal ko, okay lang kanakon. kag sara pa, kinanglan ko gd kang ka storya amo to nga time.
okay man. ka mga intelligent topics ang gin storyahan namon. kis a daw ka dalum gd. pero namian ako. kay daw ka buhay ren gd abi nga may nakilala ako nga may passion man magbasa, mag discuss about religion, society, culture differences, oppression kag iban pa nga mga ka dalmingan. ti kundi nagtabo gd utok namon eh. martes pa to nga daan kang nag umpisa tana ka tawag.
pagkadason nga adlaw, nagtawag riman tana. basta, kasagad kana. feeling ko lang. man an ko, nag drop out gali tana sa med school, ga ubra sa child protection agency, na danlug tana sa parking lot, nag suicide ang last na nga miga, nami tana mag english.
pero sa mga conversation namon, gasulod sa ulo ko pirme si a, kay ang mga tinaga bala nga gina gamit na, amo gd sa mga ginapanghambal ni a kasan o kanakon. nag wonder gani ako basi si a tana tapos naga kuno kuno lang. hay maan!
pagka huebes, naghambal tana nga gusto na mag agto ja. na shock ako eh. hambal ko, kung gusto mo mag agto, agto kaw eh. baw nag check tana dayon kang flights kag kung anu ano pa. pero later on, nag desisyon man tana nga dar-on na na lang sarakyan na. ti, sige, amo to, hambalanay kami nga ma storya na lang kami liwan pagka biernes ti aga kung gusto ko pa bala nga ma kita tana or indi.
ang hangag man nga joanna marie, pagka biernes, amo man japon ang desisyon na. nga okay lang kung mag agto tana ja kay ti wara man ti plano ang mga babaye sa amo to nga weekend. ay! may jan gali! hehehe. manyapon kina ate hazel kag mag agto sa alex. pero wara ko pa ra ginhambal sa laki.
kang sa hapon ren, sige man update namon sa sara kag sara kung diin tana ron. hambal na mga ala siete tana maabot. ti gihambal ko man kay ate hazel nga part kang pag move on ko, may maagto nga laki ja kanakon. okay man kay ate hazel. hambal na gani nga dar on ko sa balay na.
baw! nag alas siete ren wara japon nag abot ang laki. nagtawag, hambal na nagtalang tana, sala nga way gi agyan na. pagka alas otso y medya, nagtawag riman. gin dakup kuno tana kang police kay dasig padalagan na. mabayad kuno tana ti 7 thousand kroner! whhhaaat?! baw! daw na konsensya man ko ba! pero natak an ako kahulat kana. maan!
tapos pati si ate hazel, nag ugtas kanakon nga ginhulat ko gd tana. daad kuno nagsunod ren ako kay jillian pagsugat kana ni kuya geir. wara ko ren gani ginsabat mga tawag na mong. kay natak an man ako.
mga alas nueve y medya tana nag abot. hambal ko sa esso kami makitaay. pag abot ko to, may nakita ako nga pula nga sarakyan. sa isip ko lang, baw daad indi ra tana kay karaw ay kang sakyanan na! gintawgan ko tana. baw. ana gd ang pula nga sarakyan. kag pagnaug na sa car, pagkita ko kana, nagpati gd ako dayon nga ang karma, indi lang haum haum, kundi tuod tuod gd. kag indi mo lang mabatyagan, makita mo pa! in short, indi ko gd tana feel! daw masuka ako!
pero ti, wara ren ako ti may mahimo kay jan ren. nag usik tana ka walo ka oras para mag agto ja. gipasakayan ko na lang eh. storya storya man kami samtang paagto kanday ate hazel.
pag abot sa balay ni hg, pagkakita ko pa lang kananda, nag libot ren kalimutaw ko! daw madalagan ako nga indi ko maintindihan. syempre, para ano pa nga nag intermedius ako kung indi ako kamaan mag arte, di ba? yuhom yuhom lang ako sa tubang na eh. mayad lang kay si hg, todo ang supota kanakon. after na nga taw an ka damug, gihambalan na nga to mapungko sa sala imaw ni kuya geir.
baw! kang kami na lang nga tatlo ni jillian ang bilin sa kusina, grabe ren ang mga hinambalanon kag kadlaw eh. to ren nag umpisa ang hambal ko nga gina karma ako. si jillian man tana, gina confirm na man kanakon. si hg tana, hambal na, indi ren ra pagpadayuna joanna! hay maan! grabe ren kinadlaw namin eh! tapos indi man kami pagusto ka panglibak kay makita naman kami sa sala. may time pa to gani nga nagpalipud ako mong kay daw gusto ko ra gd mag syagit!
pagkatapos namon tana kaon, naghimos ren si hg para magpa alex. ang karma tana, to sa sala eh kag ga storya kay kuya geir. pasalamat lang ako kay kuya geir. kang ready kami ren, ginhambalan tana ni hg nga, ma gwa kami, kung gusto mo ja lang kaw kag mag storya sa bana ko. hahaha! hambal na, ay, nag agto ako ja para makita si joanna. hambal ko, sunod kaw sa alex eh, okay lang man ra. so amo ren to. kang sa sarakyan kami ren, ga reklamo si hg kang pang drive na. pati ako nakulbaan man gani. maan ah. daw ka reckless lang kana mag maneho abi. pero mayad lang to kay naka abot man kami sa alex nga buhi.
kang sa alex ren, nainit ako kay gina bayaan kami ni hg, jillian kag pia. kag nag order tana kang irimnon na, wara na man lang ako gi orderan! hmp! tapos syempre, gusto ko magsaot, magliwaliw ukon magtanga man lang sa mga naga saot. baw, ana tana sagay ka storya about writing, nga immature pa tana kuno para maging writer, gusto na magdaug sa lotto, storya about a famous norwegian author, kung nag madre bala ako. maan! daw gusto ko hambalon nga, pwede, indi lang ta mag storyahanay? natak an ako! pagbalik gani nanda ni jillian, nag excuse ako dayon nga mag banyo kay indi ko ra gd kaya. hambal pa ni hg, paulia ren to ra sa hotel na! hahaha! si hg talaga! kag, gapabati bati pa si jillian nga gusto na mag tequila, ay, gin ignore na lang si jillian! insensitive!
kang dali na lang mag sarado ang alex, ginhambalan ko tana nga kung gusto na ren mag balik sa hotel na, panaw lang tana. in fairness, gidul ong ko pa tana sa gwa ha! gosh! nagpaka nice man ako kana.
pagka bugtaw ko kang sabado, nag text ako kana. gi kamusta ko lang tana. hambal na maagto tana ja kay mangape. gikita ko tana sa esso riman. baw, namayha gd ako daad nga makita kang mga taga stryn nga gapanaw panaw nga may imaw nga karma, pero anhon ko ra abi. gin panindugan ko na lang ang pagka nice ko e. to ko tana gin dara sa kapehan nga talagsa lang namon gina kadtuan. ang topic naman namon kang amo to nga time, autism kag mga advanced research on how to work with children with autism. o di ba? abi ko gani gina study-han na man ako eh. super behave ako gani. ga hango hango lang kag mag komentar kung kaisa.
pagka turok na sa orasan na, naghugyaw ang kalag ko! kang gapanaw kami pabalik sa sarakyan na, nakita ko si jillian sa pihak nga karsada. baw, mas naghugyaw pa gd ako! gindul ong tana namon nga darwa ni jillian sa sarakyan na. pagkatapos mag paalam kana, pagtalikod ko, hambal ko gd dayon kay jillian, hay salamat! natapos gd man! pamatyag ko nga daan, amo to ang pinakalawig nga adlaw kang kabuhi ko. kag matyag ko ginsilutan gd ako sa kung ano man nga mga kasal anan nga nahimo ko.
pag agto namon ni jillian sa torg, medyo dura pa ako sa paminsaron ko. naga tanga pa ako gani. ginhambalan pa ako ni jillian na magtarong kay daw buang lang ako nga sagay hambal tapos matanga.
hay! kung ginsilutan gd man ako kang amo to nga weekend, ti siguro, deserving gd man ako. kay nag antos gd ako ti perti! kag sa mga nagsunod nga inadlaw, grabe man ang pasakit ko. so tulad, nga medyo naka hinulsol ako ren kag nakapanumdom ti gamay, daw medyo nadura riman ang karma ah.
kabay pa nga indi ren magbalik kag indi ren ja matabo riwan kanakon!
indi ako ren magliwan! sumpa man!
2 weeks ago, may nakilala ako nga laki. pagkatapos nga mag chat sa ym, daw nawili lang kami ka storya, gintao na ang number na. ako man nga hangag, gintao ko man akon number. wara gani guro sangka oras namangkot tana kung pwede kuno tana katawag. ti hambal ko, okay lang kanakon. kag sara pa, kinanglan ko gd kang ka storya amo to nga time.
okay man. ka mga intelligent topics ang gin storyahan namon. kis a daw ka dalum gd. pero namian ako. kay daw ka buhay ren gd abi nga may nakilala ako nga may passion man magbasa, mag discuss about religion, society, culture differences, oppression kag iban pa nga mga ka dalmingan. ti kundi nagtabo gd utok namon eh. martes pa to nga daan kang nag umpisa tana ka tawag.
pagkadason nga adlaw, nagtawag riman tana. basta, kasagad kana. feeling ko lang. man an ko, nag drop out gali tana sa med school, ga ubra sa child protection agency, na danlug tana sa parking lot, nag suicide ang last na nga miga, nami tana mag english.
pero sa mga conversation namon, gasulod sa ulo ko pirme si a, kay ang mga tinaga bala nga gina gamit na, amo gd sa mga ginapanghambal ni a kasan o kanakon. nag wonder gani ako basi si a tana tapos naga kuno kuno lang. hay maan!
pagka huebes, naghambal tana nga gusto na mag agto ja. na shock ako eh. hambal ko, kung gusto mo mag agto, agto kaw eh. baw nag check tana dayon kang flights kag kung anu ano pa. pero later on, nag desisyon man tana nga dar-on na na lang sarakyan na. ti, sige, amo to, hambalanay kami nga ma storya na lang kami liwan pagka biernes ti aga kung gusto ko pa bala nga ma kita tana or indi.
ang hangag man nga joanna marie, pagka biernes, amo man japon ang desisyon na. nga okay lang kung mag agto tana ja kay ti wara man ti plano ang mga babaye sa amo to nga weekend. ay! may jan gali! hehehe. manyapon kina ate hazel kag mag agto sa alex. pero wara ko pa ra ginhambal sa laki.
kang sa hapon ren, sige man update namon sa sara kag sara kung diin tana ron. hambal na mga ala siete tana maabot. ti gihambal ko man kay ate hazel nga part kang pag move on ko, may maagto nga laki ja kanakon. okay man kay ate hazel. hambal na gani nga dar on ko sa balay na.
baw! nag alas siete ren wara japon nag abot ang laki. nagtawag, hambal na nagtalang tana, sala nga way gi agyan na. pagka alas otso y medya, nagtawag riman. gin dakup kuno tana kang police kay dasig padalagan na. mabayad kuno tana ti 7 thousand kroner! whhhaaat?! baw! daw na konsensya man ko ba! pero natak an ako kahulat kana. maan!
tapos pati si ate hazel, nag ugtas kanakon nga ginhulat ko gd tana. daad kuno nagsunod ren ako kay jillian pagsugat kana ni kuya geir. wara ko ren gani ginsabat mga tawag na mong. kay natak an man ako.
mga alas nueve y medya tana nag abot. hambal ko sa esso kami makitaay. pag abot ko to, may nakita ako nga pula nga sarakyan. sa isip ko lang, baw daad indi ra tana kay karaw ay kang sakyanan na! gintawgan ko tana. baw. ana gd ang pula nga sarakyan. kag pagnaug na sa car, pagkita ko kana, nagpati gd ako dayon nga ang karma, indi lang haum haum, kundi tuod tuod gd. kag indi mo lang mabatyagan, makita mo pa! in short, indi ko gd tana feel! daw masuka ako!
pero ti, wara ren ako ti may mahimo kay jan ren. nag usik tana ka walo ka oras para mag agto ja. gipasakayan ko na lang eh. storya storya man kami samtang paagto kanday ate hazel.
pag abot sa balay ni hg, pagkakita ko pa lang kananda, nag libot ren kalimutaw ko! daw madalagan ako nga indi ko maintindihan. syempre, para ano pa nga nag intermedius ako kung indi ako kamaan mag arte, di ba? yuhom yuhom lang ako sa tubang na eh. mayad lang kay si hg, todo ang supota kanakon. after na nga taw an ka damug, gihambalan na nga to mapungko sa sala imaw ni kuya geir.
baw! kang kami na lang nga tatlo ni jillian ang bilin sa kusina, grabe ren ang mga hinambalanon kag kadlaw eh. to ren nag umpisa ang hambal ko nga gina karma ako. si jillian man tana, gina confirm na man kanakon. si hg tana, hambal na, indi ren ra pagpadayuna joanna! hay maan! grabe ren kinadlaw namin eh! tapos indi man kami pagusto ka panglibak kay makita naman kami sa sala. may time pa to gani nga nagpalipud ako mong kay daw gusto ko ra gd mag syagit!
pagkatapos namon tana kaon, naghimos ren si hg para magpa alex. ang karma tana, to sa sala eh kag ga storya kay kuya geir. pasalamat lang ako kay kuya geir. kang ready kami ren, ginhambalan tana ni hg nga, ma gwa kami, kung gusto mo ja lang kaw kag mag storya sa bana ko. hahaha! hambal na, ay, nag agto ako ja para makita si joanna. hambal ko, sunod kaw sa alex eh, okay lang man ra. so amo ren to. kang sa sarakyan kami ren, ga reklamo si hg kang pang drive na. pati ako nakulbaan man gani. maan ah. daw ka reckless lang kana mag maneho abi. pero mayad lang to kay naka abot man kami sa alex nga buhi.
kang sa alex ren, nainit ako kay gina bayaan kami ni hg, jillian kag pia. kag nag order tana kang irimnon na, wara na man lang ako gi orderan! hmp! tapos syempre, gusto ko magsaot, magliwaliw ukon magtanga man lang sa mga naga saot. baw, ana tana sagay ka storya about writing, nga immature pa tana kuno para maging writer, gusto na magdaug sa lotto, storya about a famous norwegian author, kung nag madre bala ako. maan! daw gusto ko hambalon nga, pwede, indi lang ta mag storyahanay? natak an ako! pagbalik gani nanda ni jillian, nag excuse ako dayon nga mag banyo kay indi ko ra gd kaya. hambal pa ni hg, paulia ren to ra sa hotel na! hahaha! si hg talaga! kag, gapabati bati pa si jillian nga gusto na mag tequila, ay, gin ignore na lang si jillian! insensitive!
kang dali na lang mag sarado ang alex, ginhambalan ko tana nga kung gusto na ren mag balik sa hotel na, panaw lang tana. in fairness, gidul ong ko pa tana sa gwa ha! gosh! nagpaka nice man ako kana.
pagka bugtaw ko kang sabado, nag text ako kana. gi kamusta ko lang tana. hambal na maagto tana ja kay mangape. gikita ko tana sa esso riman. baw, namayha gd ako daad nga makita kang mga taga stryn nga gapanaw panaw nga may imaw nga karma, pero anhon ko ra abi. gin panindugan ko na lang ang pagka nice ko e. to ko tana gin dara sa kapehan nga talagsa lang namon gina kadtuan. ang topic naman namon kang amo to nga time, autism kag mga advanced research on how to work with children with autism. o di ba? abi ko gani gina study-han na man ako eh. super behave ako gani. ga hango hango lang kag mag komentar kung kaisa.
pagka turok na sa orasan na, naghugyaw ang kalag ko! kang gapanaw kami pabalik sa sarakyan na, nakita ko si jillian sa pihak nga karsada. baw, mas naghugyaw pa gd ako! gindul ong tana namon nga darwa ni jillian sa sarakyan na. pagkatapos mag paalam kana, pagtalikod ko, hambal ko gd dayon kay jillian, hay salamat! natapos gd man! pamatyag ko nga daan, amo to ang pinakalawig nga adlaw kang kabuhi ko. kag matyag ko ginsilutan gd ako sa kung ano man nga mga kasal anan nga nahimo ko.
pag agto namon ni jillian sa torg, medyo dura pa ako sa paminsaron ko. naga tanga pa ako gani. ginhambalan pa ako ni jillian na magtarong kay daw buang lang ako nga sagay hambal tapos matanga.
hay! kung ginsilutan gd man ako kang amo to nga weekend, ti siguro, deserving gd man ako. kay nag antos gd ako ti perti! kag sa mga nagsunod nga inadlaw, grabe man ang pasakit ko. so tulad, nga medyo naka hinulsol ako ren kag nakapanumdom ti gamay, daw medyo nadura riman ang karma ah.
kabay pa nga indi ren magbalik kag indi ren ja matabo riwan kanakon!
indi ako ren magliwan! sumpa man!
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