what dreams may come

we were standing on the cliff...my favorite hiding place in the forest.

the fjord reflected all the wonderful colors of the blue sky, the jolly colors of the autumn leaves and it shimmered with the sun's rays.

you were there by my side. admiring the beauty and stillness of the earth and its elements.

i was there by your side. looking at the wonders all around me. i was filled with so much happiness because the love of my life was there beside me. i was overjoyed because i was sharing that perfect moment with you.

suddenly, you held my hand and turned. we stood face to face. you were smiling, but i saw the worried look on your eyes. right then, i knew that something terrible is about to happen. my heart beat double time and i felt like it was about to skip out of my chest. i felt warm. no, i felt cold. i can feel the sweat on my palms and i wished you'd let go of my hands.

none of us spoke for what seemed like an eternity. i felt like dying just by looking at your eyes. those deep honey-colored eyes. i wished you'd say something to end my agony. i wished i could say something, but my mind was racing with so many thoughts and my tounge was glued.

just as the gushing wind and rustling leaves broke the silence in the forest, you broke yours too. your sad eyes never left mine when you said, "joanna, i can no longer go on with this. i have stopped loving you. this is goodbye for the two of us."

my heart throbbed louder that it was impossible for me to hear anything else aside from its deafening beat. my heart skipped faster that i can't keep up with it. i felt warm tears on my cheeks. i just kept on looking at you. at your eyes. somehow, i was expecting to see a little love and kindness in them. but there were none. there was only sadness.

then you let go of my hand, turned to the direction of the forest trail and left.

you left me crying on the cliff...my favorite hiding place in the forest.

************

i woke up gasping for air. i breathed double time. my lungs hurt. no, it was my heart that was hurting. as i adjusted my eyes in the darkness of my bedroom, i realized that they were misty. then, i felt the tears on my cheeks.

i checked my phone. 3:21 am

i sat on my bed hugging a pillow. i felt so scared and heart-broken as the dream flashed back to my mind. i just sat there, silent tears kept on flowing down my cheeks. i tried to ignore the dream that i just had but i can't. i refused to go back to sleep, terrified with the thought of dreaming again.