Keeping a Secret

when we lost Fasu almost a year ago, daddy said that he's not going to take another dog. Fasu was the last one. and i shared his sentiments. i loved Fasu dearly. she will always be in my heart. and i miss her so much. especially on the days when i take a walk in the forest. it used to be our thing. now, i just walk in the forest alone. but you know, i get by and somehow gotten used to it. and daddy has been quiet for a while about having a dog.

i feel like i'm ready to have another baby in the family. but i am also afraid. afraid to love again and going through that heartbreak when you loose someone you love. i don't know know if i can do that all over again.

these past weeks, daddy has been watching dog videos on his fb and insta. last week, he asked his friend if she can recommend a kennel where he can check out some german shepherds. his friend has a german shepherd, as well, but she said that she wouldn't recommend the kennel where she took her dog. he even asked a friend from Estonia for suggestions, as well.

daddy's dog fever has been so high that day. i was doing something in the kitchen and i thought he was doing paperworks in the living room. in fact, he was checking some kennels online. he came to the kitchen showing me pictures of newborn puppies. i said, "oh, they're so cute, alright. but what is this all about?" he excitedly told me that the puppies are in the south of Pohjanmaa. their mom is a mix of german shepherd and australian kelpie. 

he sent an e-mail to the dog's owner and asked if it's okay for us to visit to look at the puppies. so we set an appointment on labor's day. it's a 507 km drive from where we live. one thousand and fourteen kilometers to drive all in all. daddy's dog fever is serious.

yesterday, we had a phone call with the dog owner. she told us more information about the dog parents, allergies and all. she also asked what kind of place we live in. she wanted to know what kind of environment the puppy will be living in, in case we get to choose one.

so, the date is set. 

i'm giving daddy a poker face about this issue. in my heart, i'm excited and i even feel like crying when i think about having a new baby. Amanda Panda will have a playmate! i don't know how Amanda will react to this though....

as we went to sleep last night, i asked daddy if he has thought about any names for the puppy. he said, "i have some ideas, but for now i just want to sleep". i stayed awake for a bit longer, smiling and thinking about names for the puppy...